I Dont Know What to Say I Know That I Could Show You Lyrics

Love songs are where we get our passion, our soul — and most of our worst ideas.

Zippo skillful can come of this. Photo past Achim Voss/Flickr.

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Throughout man history, oceans accept been crossed, mountains accept been scaled, and great families have blossomed — all because of a few simple chords and a melody that inflamed a centre and propelled it on a noble, romantic mission.

On the other paw, that time you told that daughter you just started seeing that you would "catch a grenade" for her? You did that because of a love vocal. And it wasn't exactly a coincidence that she suddenly decided to "lose your number" and move dorsum to Milwaukee to "figure some stuff out."

"It's simply, my mom. Yous know? And L.A. is so hot in the summer. And yeah, my mom." Photograph via iStock.

That time yous held that boom box over your head outside your ex's house? You lot did that because of a love song. And 50 hours of customs service later, you're still not back together.

Love songs are great. They make our hearts shell faster. They inspire u.s. to take risks and put our feelings on the line. And they give u.s. terrible, terrible ideas most how actual, real-life human relationships should work.

They're amazing. So amazing. And likewise terrible.

Here are vi love songs that audio romantic but aren't, and i song that doesn't sound romantic but totally is:

i. "God Simply Knows," by The Beach Boys

Yous can keep your "Surfin' Safaris," your "I Get Arounds," and your "Help me Rhondas."

When it comes to The Beach Boys, "God Merely Knows" is where it's at. A lush garden of soft horns and breezy melody. A tie-dye swirl of sound. A landscape of haunted innocence with some of the near heartrending lyrics ever committed to the back of a surfboard.

Youth! Youth! Youth! Photograph by Hulton Archive/Getty Images.

Here's why it sounds romantic:

I may not ever honey you

But long as there are stars above y'all

Yous never need to doubtfulness it

I'll brand you so sure nearly it

God just knows what I'd exist without you

If you lot're traipsing through a meadow in a sundress with your beloved and not playing "God Only Knows" on your iPod, y'all should really stop and starting time over.

If you're lazily bumping a beach ball over a volleyball net and "God Only Knows" isn't playing somewhere in the dorsum of your heed, you lot need to rethink the choices that got you to this indicate.

If yous're a video editor compiling footage of grainy hippies frolicking in the mud and you're not underscoring information technology with the opening chords of "God Simply Knows," you are doing it wrong.

Hippies, likely on their way to a mud frolic. Photo by Colin Davey/Getty Images.

It'south a vocal that merely feels like dearest. Pure beloved. Young love. Love with a chill, kelp-y vibe.

What could be wrong with that?

Here'south why information technology's actually really, really unromantic:

There's nothing wrong with loving someone. Sending them flowers. Leaving over-the-top notes in their P.O. boxes. Stroking their hair as they fall asleep while you whisper the complete works of Nicholas Sparks into their ear.

"Miles Ryan stood on the back porch of his house, smoking a cigarette..." Photograph past hatchettebookgroup.biz.

But in that location is such a thing as loving someone a skosh too much.

If you should e'er get out me

Though life would still go on believe me

The earth could prove nothing to me

So what good would living do me?

Look, I become it. Breakups suck. There's no getting around that. But good God.

There's a huge deviation betwixt saying: "Hey babe, you lot are my first and foremost everything and I'll exist bummed if y'all go." And maxim: "Welp, you accepted that job in Seattle, so I'one thousand just gonna chug a bunch of nightshade and phone call it a life."

But that's pretty much the gist hither. Which makes this line...

God just knows what I'd be without you

...horror-picture creepy. Considering the respond, apparently, is: "I'd be a corpse!"

Ah well. We had a proficient run. Photo via iStock.

That's not love. That's codependency (to put information technology mildly). Oh, and hey! Threatening to kill yourself if your partner leaves isn't loving. Information technology's a form of emotional corruption.

Investing all your happiness and sense of self-worth in any relationship — one that, past definition, might one mean solar day cease — is putting a lot of eggs in ane handbasket. Sure, God may merely know what yous'd be without her, but God probably also hopes you have, I don't know, some hobbies. Accept a yoga class. Google some woodworking videos. Try kite surfing.

"Yep! Hell yeah! What was her name again?" Photograph by Jim Semlor/Federal Highway Administration.

Ane person cannot be anyone's exist-all and stop-all. It'due south too stressful. And it prevents you from doing you lot, which is a thing that's gotta be done before you tin practice anything else.

No wonder she took that task in Seattle.

2. "Treasure," by Bruno Mars

Sure, it's a blatant rip off of every Michael Jackson song you've ever heard. But, we don't take Michael Jackson anymore, and equally tribute acts go, you lot could practice a lot worse than Bruno Mars.

Await at that face. That face! Photo by Brothers Le/Flickr.

Here's why the song sounds romantic:

Treasure, that is what you are

Beloved, you're my gilt star

Yous know you can make my wish come up true

If y'all let me treasure you lot

If you let me treasure yous

Laissez passer those lyrics to anyone on a used napkin at an 8th-course make-out party and you'll likely go an instant toll pass on the highway to tongue-town (ew).

Pass them to your spouse and, chances are, date night is going to culminate in 47 minutes of chaste-still-passionate frenching.

Pass them to a cop who pulls you over for running a stop sign, and they volition think you're weird — but probably still make out with you.

In fact, Bruno Mars basically has a lifetime pass to make out with America because of this song.

This is what happens when you write "Treasure" and you're on phase with Michelle Obama. Photo by Mandel Ngan/Getty Images.

And I'm OK with that.

But, here's why "Treasure" isn't every bit romantic equally it seems:

Everything about "Treasure" is retro. Everything.

Including its attitudes most gender.

"Children, have I always told you lot what I shouted at your mother on the street the first fourth dimension we met?" Photo past Jacobsen/Getty Images.

Things start to become south right from the very beginning:

Requite me your, give me your, requite me your attention, infant

I gotta tell you a piffling something about yourself

Ah yes. Zero screams "respect" quite like a human being lecturing a strange woman on the street about something she "doesn't know about herself."

What could it be? Could information technology be that her jokes are funny? Could information technology be that she's got something in her teeth? Could it be that her nonfiction book about early on modern German history is extremely detailed and informative?

"Thanks for pedagogy me all about Martin Luther's bible!" Photo past Torsten Schleese/Wikimedia Commons.

Spoiler Alarm: It's none of those.

You're wonderful, flawless, ooh, you lot're a sexy lady

But you walk around here like y'all wanna be someone else

Oh. It's that she's sexy. Absurd, bro. Very original.

Discussion of advice? Regardless of how she's walking, the lady knows she's sexy. Even if she doesn't, it actually doesn't touch her twenty-four hour period-to-twenty-four hour period so much that you, a complete stranger, need to shout information technology at her (even over a funky disco snare).

So what if she does want to be someone else? I'd beloved to exist someone else! I think being Ryan Gosling would be quite nice. A adept manner to spend a iii-mean solar day weekend.

Sure, there'd exist an adjustment period... Photo past Eamonn M. McCormack/Getty Images.

Then later on, of course, the narrator tin can't assistance himself:

Pretty girl, pretty girl, pretty girl, you should be smiling

A girl like you should never await so blue.

He respects her and so much, he's really straight-upward telling her to grinning! Much similar Mars' character "Uptown Funk," who appears to get off on angrily exhorting girls to "hit [their] hallelujah." Which, you know, I estimate everybody'due south got a thing.

Yep, in the world of "Treasure," a healthy human relationship is an unending stream of a human being complimenting a strange woman and said woman beingness then totally flattered that she immediately dispenses "the sexual practice."

He then proceeds to talk to his potential lover like the earth's creepiest pirate:

You are my treasure, you are my treasure

You are my treasure, yeah, you, you lot, you lot, you are

You are my treasure, you are my treasure

You lot are my treasure, yeah, you, yous, you, you are

By this point, in his mind, she'southward a literal matter. An object. Which is fitting.

I suppose information technology could be worse, though. At least she'due south not but any thing.

GIF from "The 2 Towers."

That's ... something, right?

iii. "Don't Call up Twice, It's All Right," by Bob Dylan

For as long every bit humans have been dating each other, humans have been breaking up with each other. And "Don't Think Twice" is a portrait of a relationship going down in flames. Glorious, poetic, acoustic flames.

Bob Dylan, a guy who is good at writing songs that a lot of people like. Photo by William Lovelace/Getty Images.

Here's why it sounds romantic:

Well, it ain't no use to sit and wonder why, babe

Even you don't know by at present

And it ain't no employ to sit and wonder why, babe

It'll never do somehow

When your rooster crows at the break of dawn

Look out your window, and I'll be gone

You're the reason I'thou a-traveling on

But don't think twice, information technology's all right.

Boom. Strummed on out of that friends-with-benefits situation like whoa.

"Don't Retrieve Twice" is a raw song. An honest song. A powerful vocal. It's the song your older sister played on continuous loop for six months after her boyfriend left for college. The vocal that convinced your Aunt Roslyn to go out her bank-teller job, load her four Australian shepherds into the van, and open a wind chime store in Mendocino. The song your friend'south cool dad always wants to play when he invited your high school ring over to his apartment to jam.

"What timbre are you looking for?" Photo by Sharon Ang/Pixabay.

Certain, it'due south near the end of a relationship, but it sounds romantic. And at the end of the day, shouldn't that be plenty?

Here's why it's really sooooo messed upward:

Relationships end. For a lot of reasons. And while at that place is no right way to phone call it quits with someone, when the dust settles, both parties can certainly benefit from a difficult, honest discussion about what went wrong.

It'south not me, Joan. It'south y'all. 100% yous. Photograph by Rowland Scherman/Getty Images.

In "Don't Call up Twice," that give-and-take basically boils down to: "It's your fault."

Let'south review the reasons the dude in "Don't Call up Twice" is splitting with his lady friend:

I gave her my eye, merely she wanted my soul

Ugh, women, right? You're all like, "Babe, I merely have so much unspecified beloved to requite," and she's like, "Take out the trash!" And yous're like, "Merely baaaaaaabe, shouldn't my heart be enough?" And she'southward like, "No, seriously. I already did the laundry, cleaned the whole house, fed the dog, did the dishes, and made both of our lunches for the week. All I need you to practise is take out the trash." And you're similar, "You're bumming me out. I'm gonna become play guitar." And then she gets all mad! What did you practise? Why is she trying to modify yous? UGH!

Yous could have done better, but I don't mind

Yep. You do heed! Yous mind! Yous wrote a song about information technology, you lot passive-aggressive prick.

You just kinda wasted my precious time

Ah yes. Your time is so precious! Think most all the hours you wasted plumbing the ocean-deep, ecstatic mysteries of human partnership when you could have been futzing around with that home-brew kit.

Yes, this was worth information technology. Photo past Bill Bradford/Flickr.

The infinitesimal you start breaking it downward, the message of "Don't Call back Twice" suddenly starts to seem a lot less romantic. Like your sister'southward ex-fellow, who worked at the Bass Pro Shop in boondocks for a while and now might be in jail. Like your aunt's wind chinkle store, which would have closed forever agone had she not received that inheritance from her mom in the '80s. Like your friend's cool dad, who wasn't exactly, technically, paying child support.

"You kids want a beer? No one'southward nether 13, correct?" Photo via iStock.

Oh yeah, and the vocal's narrator as well point-bare refers woman he's leaving as:

A child, I'thou told

That's correct. In addition to beingness a run-of-the-mill passive-ambitious wiggle — turns out, he'southward also possibly a pedophile.

Fifty-fifty if we are to accept that this is a metaphor and she's not actually a child — which there'south no indication it is, merely OK, Bob Dylan — the fact that Commitmentphobe Gunderson here would willingly cull an immature partner reflects way more poorly on him than it does on her.

Breaking up with anyone in such a barbarous, dismissive way is a recipe for sticking them with years of therapy bills.

Which, I suppose, may be the signal.

4. "Leaving on a Jet Aeroplane," by John Denver

Who has two thumbs and wrote a bloodshot folk song about hurtling through the stratosphere in a giant aluminum tube at 600 miles per hour?

This guy. Photo past Hughes Television Network/Wikimedia Eatables.

Hither's why it sounds romantic:

"Leaving on a Jet Plane" is a lovely song. And impressive in its loveliness considering jet planes were still kind of new at the time it was written.

'Cause I'm leavin' on a jet plane

To a modern ear, this would exist sort of similar singing, "I'm a scoooting away on my hoverboooooard," but in a way that'southward somehow still folksy and heartbreaking and singable by nine-yr-olds at summer camp. Not easy to exercise!

Oh baby, I hate to go

You see — he hates to go! He just hates it! Nosotros know this, because he tells u.s. he hates information technology. And why would he hate to go if he didn't dear his partner only that much?

See ya! Photograph by Altair78/Wikimedia Commons.

Why indeed?

Hither'south why it'south actually non that romantic at all:

All the plaintive guitar, loping bass line, and twangy, melancholy warbling in the world can only distract and so much from the fact that the vocal'due south master character is well, kind of a jerkweed.

And in reality — surprise surprise! — information technology doesn't actually seem like he hates being away all that much:

There's then many times I've let you down

So many times I've played around

I tell yous at present, they don't mean a thing

"Babe, I promise! All the movies I watched alone while you were home nursing the quadruplets. All the times I drained our life savings on Zoo Zillionaire. All the random sex I had with other women. Totally meaningless. Certainly fun to do! Really fun. Like, I had a fantastic time. But rest assured — completely empty, in an ontological sense."

"As empty as this bed I just finished having sex with someone else in." Photo via iStock.

Yep, when y'all break it downwardly, "Leaving on a Jet Aeroplane," is less of a passionate tribute to love overcoming distance and more the deluded ramblings of a guy who needs to convince himself he'due south "skilful" despite all evidence to the opposite.

And for all he claims to be cleaved upwardly about having to part from his one and but, the dude seems pretty excited near the flight. Oh, you're leaving on a jet plane, are you? Are you lot Zone ane? Gonna humblebrag on Twitter about the "terrible" Cibo express salad you were forced to choke down every bit you saturday waiting to commence on your fun, mysterious take chances?

"Life so difficult @ LGA #missingmybabe." Photograph by Gesalbte/Wikimedia Commons.

He continues:

Ev'ry place I go, I'll think of you

Ev'ry song I sing, I'll sing for you

Ah cool. He'll recollect almost her while strumming and making "my love is frail as the morning dew" optics at a waif-y grad student in the front row. That pretty much makes up for information technology all.

Then he demands:

So kiss me and smile for me

Tell me that you'll wait for me

Subsequently all the betrayal and heartbreak, afterwards basically revealing himself to exist a grade-A sleaze who can't be trusted, he still has the gall to tell her to look? To expect for him?

And here's the kicker:

When I come back, I'll bring your hymeneals ring

Ah yes. He'll put a ring on it. Finally.

"Ehhhhhhh...." Photo via iStock.

Unlike all the previous trips, where he's cheated a billion times, drained the family bank business relationship, and just been a general screwup and disappointment.

Just yeah. This fourth dimension he says he'll bring back a wedding ring.

I hope she joins a polyamorous octad and never looks dorsum.

5. "When a Man Loves a Woman," Percy Sledge

When you look upward "soul" in the dictionary, the book plays you a recording of this song.

Percy Sledge, having a few thoughts. Photo past Gene Pugh/Flickr.

Specifically, it plays you the very first line.

Hither'south why it audio very romantic:

When a human loves a adult female

Certain, you can write the lyrics downwards, simply it doesn't even come close to capturing the heartache. The yearning. The succulent, succulent pain-belting:

WHEN A MAN LOVES A WOMAN

Closer ... merely still no.

WHEN A MAAAAAAAN. LOVES A WOOOMAN!

Yes! Sing it, Percy Sledge!

It'south an elemental lyric.

Information technology's a heart-shattering lyric.

It's a lyric that demands you put your dorsum into it.

It's perfection.

Every bit long as y'all don't go on listening.

Hither'due south why the song is actually pretty horrifying:

From the opening lines of "When a Human being Loves a Adult female," nosotros know that, at least on occasion, a man loves a woman.

Which raises the question: What happens when said man loves said woman?

He'd give up all his comforts

And slumber out in the rain

If she said that's the way

It ought to be.

Whoa! OK. No. Back up. A human, no thing how devoted, no matter how selfless, no matter how in love, needs shelter. Otherwise, a man will die of exposure and hypothermia.

Plow his back on his best friend if he put her downward.

No! Jeez. No. A man can't put upwardly with that kind of isolating behavior. A human being needs friends! Once a man'southward whole support system erodes out from nether him, a homo will be biting, ungrounded, and lone. And a man's mental wellness will deteriorate.

I gave you everything I have

Tryin' to hold on to your heartless love

Baby, delight don't treat me bad.

This is not what happens "when a man loves a woman." Information technology'south what happens when a man loves a controlling, manipulative woman. An abusive woman. A woman who, in truth, only loves a adult female. Herself.

"It's Chris or me." Photo by geralt/Pixabay.

And that'southward not healthy.

Run, Percy Sledge, run! We're here for you.

(Side note: Lest it go unsaid, there is mode more one mode for a human being to love a woman. Maybe they spend every waking moment cuddling and bopping each other on the nose. Possibly they sleep in split bedrooms. Perhaps they dress upwards in large, plush true cat costumes and refer to each other Mr. and Mrs. Kittyhawk. And when a man loves a man, I imagine it feels much the same. Or when a adult female loves a adult female. Or when a gender nonconforming person loves a gender nonconforming person.)

Regardless of the depth of commitment, living situation, or combination of genders or sexual orientations, there'due south no ane-size-fits-all love solution. Every human relationship is a unique snowflake. Multifariousness is the spice of life. Necessity is the female parent of invention. There'due south more than than 1 way to skin a cat. A spoonful of carbohydrate helps the medicine become down.

It doesn't affair if it'due south the right metaphor, equally long as information technology's a metaphor. Photograph by Rosmarie Voegtli/Flickr.

Point being: Generalize at your peril, Sledge. And please, seek help! Y'all can exercise this! And if y'all e'er find yourself in a similar situation, please give these people a phone call.

6. "All I Wanna Exercise is Make Love to You lot," Eye

Honestly, Center could sing a list of the virtually popular AllRecipes ("Jaaaamie'due south Cranberry Spinach Saaaaalad/World's Best Lasaaaaagna/Sour Creeeeeam Cutouts") and it would make me want to bawl my eyes out in the arms of a tall, dark stranger at the stop of a pier.

This vocal is perfect. Yous should always be listening to it. If you're not listening to it now, smack yourself in the face up and Google it. It'southward just that important.

I am singing the phone volume. You are weeping like a tiny babe. Photo by FatCat125/Wikimedia Commons.

So much passion. So much pain. So much hair.

Here's why it sounds romantic:

Over pounding drums and a soaring tune, Middle sisters Nancy and Ann Wilson deliver a primal tribute to the i truthful romantic fantasy shared by every living being on World: picking upward an unnervingly attractive human for one dark of mind-bravado sexual activity and then releasing him back into the wild to os — simply never quite as compellingly e'er once again.

They sing:

It was a rainy dark when he came into sight

Standing by the road, no umbrella, no coat

So I pulled upwardly alongside and I offered him a ride

He accepted with a smile so we drove for a while

I don't have to get on considering y'all know what happens next, and it's awesome.

"I only sit in this cabin. Counting the days since. Counting ... the ... days." Photo by Rene Asmussen/Pexels.

Now, here's why this song is not romantic at all:

The relationship in "All I Wanna Do" seems as well good to be true. And it is. Because it's not an equally loving ,or even equally lusty, pairing at all.

It's a...

It's a...

Well. You know what it is:

Skillful at recognizing no-win situations and delicious with lemon?! Photo by Pikawil/Flickr.

For a while, things are bustling forth just fine, like whatever wholesome, illicit, anonymous matter should:

I didn't enquire him his proper name, this lonely boy in the rain

Fate, tell me information technology's right, is this love at first sight?

Sure, many of u.s.a. might hesitate to option upwardly a foreign leather-jacket-clad homo standing on the side of the road for a no-strings-fastened spiral, but our narrator just has a feeling about this guy, and sometimes, you gotta go with your gut.

I can respect that.

We made magic that dark

He did everything right

Bang-up! Seems like information technology was a good conclusion. Bonking the hitchhiker is payin' off big fourth dimension.

Only then, without alert, the song starts to sound less like an all-time not bad romance and more than like a story men's rights activists tell each other as they vape around a bivouac:

I told him "I am the blossom, yous are the seed

Nosotros walked in the garden, nosotros planted a tree

Don't try to observe me, please don't you dare

But live in my memory, you'll always be there"

I'thousand not a poet. Symbolic language often eludes me. Just unless "flower," "seed," "garden," and "tree," suddenly mean wildly different things in the context of man reproduction than they have since sexual practice was first invented in the early-1970s, we're talking about a surprise, not-mutually-consensual pregnancy!

HELLO! Photograph by Avsar Aras/Wikimedia Eatables.

Of grade, metaphors are opaque, interpretations vary, etc., etc., etc. Yous might be tempted to retrieve, "Maybe Heart meant something else by that."

To that I say, no, they definitely meant it:

Then it happened ane day

We came round the same way

You can imagine his surprise

When he saw his own eyes

There are two possibilities here.

1: The narrator of the song is recently-deceased Jerry Orbach from this creepy New York Urban center subway advertizing from 9 years ago:

Photo by eyedonation.org.

Or two: She totally conned a dude into whipping up a baby on the sly.

I said, "Please, delight understand

Ah, sure. Yeah. No worries.

I'm in love with another man

Cool, so this all makes sense and is in no fashion the nightmarish scheme of a deranged sociopath who has at present wrecked not i but two lives.

And what he couldn't give me, oh, no

Was the one niggling thing that you can"

A HUMAN LIFE! A REAL SENTIENT HUMAN LIFE THAT IS NOT INCIDENTAL TO ALL OF THIS!

The best you tin can say about that is that it's not technically illegal, and that leather-jacket man probably should take been responsible for his own birth control. Or, at the very least, asked more questions .

But ... it'south not cute. It'south not romantic (even the Wilson sisters themselves agree).

And at the end of the 24-hour interval, the shadiest graphic symbol in this vocal is somehow non the rain-soaked hitchhiker wandering to nowhere in the night.

Which... is saying something.

But there is a love song that is truly, madly, deeply perfect. An unassailable track in a sea of problematic faves.

A vocal that does everything right.

A vocal that paints a portrait of a healthy partnership built to last.

A song that tin can double as a manual for the ideal human romantic human relationship.

And that vocal is...

"Candy Shop," by fifty Cent, featuring Olivia

Here's why you might be — OK, almost definitely are — skeptical:

50 Cent (L) and that guy. You know, that guy? That guy! Photo by Ethan Miller/Getty Images.

Equally catchy as "Candy Shop" is, as fun it is to dance to, and as cathartic every bit it can exist to scream in the middle of a crowded fraternity house at 2 a.1000., at that place'due south no getting around the fact that the vocal begins similar this:

I'll take you to the candy shop

I'll allow y'all lick the lollipop

I'll post that again, in case you missed some of the nuance:

I'll have y'all to the candy shop

I'll permit y'all lick the lollipop

Way to take one for the squad, narrator of "Processed Shop"!

At first glance, "Candy Store" is nobody's idea of a classic love song.

The lyrics are ... unusually forward. The beat is kinda basic. The hook is like the music they play when Abu Nazir sidles scarily by in "Homeland."

OooooOOOOoooooOOOo. GIF from "Homeland."

It doesn't go played much anymore. When it does resurface, it feels ... kinda dated. Similar watching that DVD of "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Burn down" on your new Xbox 360.

Information technology'southward not a song y'all'd put on a mixtape for your crush. It'south not a vocal yous'd play for your spouse when the kids are at home with the babysitter and you've got 9 hours to tear up the Piscataway Hampton Inn. It'south certainly not a vocal you lot'd include on the video photograph montage you made for your grandparents' silvery anniversary.

It's but not.

Just information technology should exist.

So here it is. Here's why "Candy Store" past 50 Cent, featuring Olivia, is actually the perfect relationship vocal:

You wanna back that thing up or should I push up on it? Photo by ionasnicolae/Pixabay.

The bass drum hits. The MIDI violins whine. The vocalizer starts filling out his fellatio permission sideslip. Information technology's only been 20 seconds, and y'all're already getting ready to hang it upwards with "Candy Shop."

Merely and so ... over the square thrum and the mewling strings, a miracle occurs — in the form of a female phonation joining the rails, cutting through the din similar a clarion phone call.

She sings:

I'll take you to the candy shop (aye)

Boy, i taste of what I got (uh-huh)

I'll take you spendin' all y'all got (come on)

Keep going 'til yous hit the spot, whoa

It's mutual! It's common! They're performing oral sexual activity on each other!

Ring the bells! Blindside the drums! Release the doves!

Go, cunnilingus doves, become! Photo by liz westward/Flickr.

fifty Cent himself may non be the world'due south greatest partner — for example, according to 1 of his exes, he'southward done some pretty unforgivable things.

But the narrator of "Candy Shop"? He gets it:

You could have it your way, how do you want it?

Rather than simply imposing his desires on the person he's with — a la the dude in "God Only Knows ("I'm going to invest my entire sense of cocky-worth in you!") or the street heckler in "Treasure" ("I'm going to treat you similar a chest full of gold doubloons!") or the sociopath in "All I Wanna Do is Make Beloved to Y'all," ("I'm going to trick you into knocking me up!") — the "Candy Shop" guy actually asks his partner what she wants.

Which, in the world of popular music, is adept for near 50,000 trillion points.

And where are they going to do information technology? The hotel? Back of the rental? The embankment? The park?

It'southward whatever y'all're into

'Cause consent is sexy!

I ain't finished teaching you 'tour how sprung I got ya

The narrator of "Candy Shop" is certainly ... assertive well-nigh his desires.

But here'southward the central affair: the lady on the receiving end of those desires? She's clearly into it. And we know this considering she says and so.

The lines of consent in "Processed Shop" are vivid red, highlighted, and soldered into the weirdly gluey club floor.

Meanwhile, Robin Thicke is outside trying to convince the bouncer that his uncle is a lawyer. Photo by Grim23/Wikimedia Commons.

Girl what we do ...

And where we do ...

The things we do ...

Are only between me and you

No matter how nasty they freak, it will be intimate. It will be private. There will exist no revenge porn (the epilogue to "Blurred Lines," to wit, would definitely exist a protracted, emotionally devastating lawsuit).

If y'all be a nympho, I'll exist a nympho

Sexual compatibility is primal to the survival of whatever human relationship, whether years, weeks, or (very perchance in the case of "Candy Shop") minutes long.

She may have a high sex drive, just dude is graciously offering to accommodate her. What a gentleman! These crazy kids just might go the altitude after all.

And at the finish of the day, what is a human relationship only two nymphos, sharing health insurance?

Thanks, Obamacare! Photograph by Wonderlane/Flickr.

It'south like it's a race who could go undressed quicker

Once more, everybody is having a slap-up time. And, critically, an every bit great time.

I touch the right spot at the right time

Of course, information technology wouldn't exist a pop/hip-hop striking without a spot of random braggadocio, but if we're to take him at his word, "Candy Shop" guy is at least equally good at "doing everything right" equally the anonymous hitchhiker from "All I Wanna Exercise is Make Beloved to You" — except without all the creepy surprise baby nonsense.

The "Candy Shop" guy is a keeper. Because he'due south not a hero or a stranger in the nighttime or a funky, shimmering dear god. He's a good partner.

"Processed Shop" is raunchy. It's dirty. Information technology's non your grandmother's love song.

But when you strip abroad the swagger, the back vanquish, and the weird strings from "Best of Public Domain Middle Eastern Music 1993," by the stop of the song, both people are satisfied. And at the end of the 24-hour interval, isn't that what a good for you relationship is all about?

Yeah.

Uh-huh.

Photo by Francois Durand/Getty Images.

And then seductive.

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Source: https://www.upworthy.com/6-songs-that-seem-romantic-but-arent-and-one-that-seems-like-it-isnt-but-is

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